one year...

Just gonna let that sink in for a minute...one whole year.



There is much to say of all that encompassed this past year and in some ways I don't know where to begin...

On June 4, 2009 we had no idea quite where the road of transplant would take us. There were many unknowns that loomed large and so many questions, doubts and worries. This day marked a new start of sorts for Camryn...many call it a "birthday". A start of new life...again.

I can vividly remember walking down the hall between Wyatt's room and Camryn's room feeling almost as if it was a dream...some sort of nightmare, where we were caught between reality and fantasy. How could this all be happening? Wondering what the following days might bring for both Wyatt, the donor and Camryn, the recipient. For both of them it was going to be a journey, a fight and hopefully a victory.

I am pleased to say this little donor is doing fabulously...he gave and gave to his sister that day a year ago. He was wheeled away and I am not sure even now where Jason and I found the strength to let him go...I just could not imagine the enormity of the gift he was giving and I often wonder when his mind can fully grasp it all what he will say.



And the survivor...






She is kicking and screaming with everything she's got to be well. For all that it means for her body, mind and spirit she is fighting. Really, Camryn is doing awesome, but there are constant reminders of what has been lost for her. So even today in celebration of a year, it is hard to escape what might have been.

But, really there are two what might have beens that play through my heart...what if Camryn never relapsed, what might our lives look like then? And probably the hardest what might have been? What if Camryn did not make it through transplant? You see for all that is lost from relapsing there is much to be gained by making it this far. Oh we know Camryn has an incredibly far way to go...ask anyone battling cancer, it's never quick and easy. But for now she is a year post-transplant and that is a gift beyond measure.

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I found these notes on the kitchen table this morning...

Camryn -
Congratulations on 1 year since you got Wyatt's juice. I am so proud of you. You have done such an amazing job and have listened well to your doctors. I cannot believe just how amazing you are with all that you have to do. Thank you for being so great in going to the doctors, taking your medicine, getting your shots and doing your line changes. You are my hero and I am so happy to have you as my daughter. I love you so much. I am so proud of you and we will have a great time at Disneyland. Have a great day.
Love,
Daddy

Wyatt -
You are such an amazing little boy. You have been our blessing since the first day we found out about you. It has been a year since you gave Camryn your juice and I wanted to let you know how proud I am of you. You have shown that you will take care of your sister and be what she needs. Thank you for being a great little brother to Camryn and for always making sure she is ok. You are my best buddy and I love you very much.
Love,
Daddy

These notes melted my heart, they capture our thoughts are parents perfectly.

It's been a long year, a full year and a grateful year...

Filled with much hope for 6.4.11 and many more days after that.